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I am an aspiring photographer with an avid interest in people, literature, international issues, and learning. My free time is either spent watching some boring :) documentary, taking pictures of people and places, or exploring the Internet.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

School or Real Life?

So, I'm having a bit of a life crisis right now. I really hate graduate school. No, it's not because of the work - I like doing the readings and writing papers. I just can't stand sitting in class and listening to everyone speak just to hear their own voices. People who aren't even studying something related to the day's topics will interrupt a classmate to say, "Well, in my thesis..." and spend ten minutes blathering on about their pointless research topic. Anyone outside that discipline is totally lost in the jargon, and the few non-native English speakers in our program never get the chance to voice their opinions, because they don't know enough snobby words. Everyone talks about equality and how to solve poverty, but no one does ANYthing about it - no volunteer work, not even treating their fellow students equally. The white men dominate absolutely every class.

At first I was just frustrated with my classmates, but still trying to power through the program. Now I'm wondering if I should be in it at all. If I have such distaste for academia, and so little respect for my colleagues, is grad school really an appropriate choice? Isn't it disrespectful to just sit in class and internally mock the other students (or draw snarky comics about them)?

Maybe my time would be better spent back in the real world. I know it seems silly to get so worked up about arrogant intellectuals, but it is literally driving me insane to sit in class and listen to them proclaim their communist philosophies, as they type away on laptops manufactured by slave labor, and created with minerals from war-torn Congo. No one actually cares about the world; they just like to appear as if they do. I'm not sure how much longer I can play nicely in class. Today I didn't talk at all because I knew that it would come out as screaming, "Oh really? You think that everyone should have an equal voice in society? Then how about you let the women of color in this room say a single word!" They interrupt each other just to say more pointless things, and talk about research topics that will never have an impact on today's world. They simultaneously consider themselves to be superior intellectuals and a part of the working class.

The complete disconnection to reality is disturbing. So the question I pose to you is: should I really be going to grad school if I think it is ultimately useless and I detest most of my colleagues? I know that a graduate degree is necessary for teaching, but should I even go on to teach if I think the entire university system is defunct? Is there even a point to getting an MA in Comparative Literature if I don't plan to teach?

Help!

1 comments:

Colin said...

The combined frustrations of sitting through graduate courses in undergrad and the absolute BS of getting my research published turned me away from graduate school forever. I met too many people that were openly disdainful of the system yet were so terrified of actually working that they would do anything to continue living off government funding.

It was upsetting to me on so many levels that I ended up turning my spot down in a graduate school overseas, unable to commit myself to a life of waste and absolute unimportance. Now I am working pretty hard as a barista making minimum wage, but I don't regret it at all.